happy For you / Method Acting

My dad told me he hoped that he lived long enough

To see me happy again

I didn't know what to say to that

So all I said back was

Yeah, me too

I wanna smile without hesitation

Laugh without any reservation

Say I'm fine, and mean it

I wanna be happy

Like I know I should be

I'm sorry truly

My sadness makes you sad, too

And since I can't be happy for me

I wanna be happy for you

People tell me I look happier

Feels like a lie

Maybe I'm just better at hiding it now

Or maybe this is what healing feels like

Maybe all that it is

Is not knowing what it is

Until you do it

I was hurting so bad

For so long

And then i wasn't

Before I knew it

And there was no graduation day

No clear finish line

Just me, working

At healing my hurting and wondering

If i'll be method acting for the rest of my life

People tell me I look happier

And now I think, I do too

Either that, or I'm a damn good actor

Cos even I've got myself fooled

Somewhere I stopped

Having to pretend to be fine

Don't know when it happened

But somewhere method acting

Turned into real life

There was no graduation day

I don't know and don't care

Where i crossed the finish line

Because healing is learning

That healing from hurting

Was only a matter of time

It was, only, a matter of

It was, only, a matter of

It was, only, a matter of

It was, only, a matter of

It was, only, a matter of

It was only ever a matter

Of time